When a Kung-Fu movie has you saying those too words with that much emphasis multiple times, you know shit just got real. Ip Man is a Wing Chun Kung-Fu master. Before the Japanese invaded China, Ip Man only had to worry about random challenges from other kung fu masters. In his own calm [...]
Oh Jeez…I was in the mood for some horror so I jumped onto the PSN and rented Wolfman, I was hoping this movie was going to be good, and I was wrong. There was some strong gore, but they came in flashes. The story was EXTREMLY predictable and at no point was [...]
Instead of watching this movie, I want you to do something… Turn on some porn and play with yourself until you are almost about to climax and then stop abruptly. Now, repeat this every twenty minutes for six days. After the sixth day, wind up and punch yourself in the nuts.
There is so much [...]
“He came into town with his cock in hand, and what he did with it was illegal in 49 states.”
Eating red meat does not make you a man. Those grapes, dangling from that battered bush between your legs, does not make you a man. Wrestling the raw meat of an antelope from the [...]
Patton Oswalt is a loser, hardcore Giants fan who gets beat up by his favorite player. This turns his life upside down, not that there was much to turn over and sets off a series of events that fly out of control towards the end. This movie has finally convinced me that the Academy Awards, [...]
In the year 2000, the Japanese unleashed a movie that would separate itself from all other Japanese movies that make you say WTF? Why? Because Wild Zero doesn’t use the regular elements of Japanese movies which are 75% people staring at each other, 20% crazy shit that makes you cringe and 5% of ridiculous [...]
A young couple wants to have a baby. They’ve been trying and failing because of their weak genes (my take). They have some very boring sex and *POOF* weak, vegan woman gets pregnant.
There is a scare, they go to the hospital and hippie midwife convinces everyone that she’s okay, she just needs some [...]
The Italians make great horror movies and I was tossed up between my Halloween Movie Pick being Cemetery Man or Suspiria by the master Dario Argento, but decided to go with the former. Cemetery Man (Dellamorte Dellamore) is a story of undying love. Francesco Dellamorte (Rupert Everett) is the lonely caretaker of a damned [...]
Hello boys and girls. I’ve been slacking on my reviews lately because I’ve just gotten so excited for my favorite holiday at the end of this month… That’s right boys and girls, Halloween! I know that 95% of my reviews are already horror and sci-fi related, but this month especially, I will be reviewing movies [...]
The Hills Run Red is about a movie, by the same name, that was banned in 1982 and lost into obscurity for being too sick and twisted for mainstream theaters. This mythical slasher movie becomes the obsession of a young film maker named Tyler (Tad Hilgenbrinck). The first forty minutes of the movie is [...]
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