Spartacus: Blood and Sand

The entire look and feel of this movie is evidently ripped from the movie 300. Now that I have mentioned this show’s only weakness, let me tell you about what makes it kick ass.

Spartacus was a Thracian slave who became the greatest Gladiator in the Roman Empire. This is a fact. It is also a fact that the life of a gladiator was extremely brutal, bloody and just down right violent. So this show has blood and plenty of it. Be prepared for amputations, decapitations and eviscerations by the fucking boatload. Blood is splattered all over the place. The only good thing is that the gore, being done in obvious CGI, is less disturbing than you might imagine. It’s not a bad thing in this case, because guess what? There is actually a plot that sucks you in and keeps you interested.

There are some things that should be considered a spoiler, but honestly, if you don’t already know about Spartacus then go pick up a fucking history book. Spartacus was not only the most badass gladiator of his time, but he lead a slave revolution in Rome called the Third Servile War. Spartacus: Blood and Sand are about his gladiator days; how he got there and why he felt the need to revolt. The show sucks you in and gets you to tag along from one episode to another. There were actually some episodes with plot twists that I did not see coming.

When in Rome… Yes, when in Rome. There will be nudity. Tons of it. This show has an equal ratio of blood to boobies and I think I mentioned how much blood there was before. First of all, guys, if staring at naked men makes you uncomfortable because deep down inside you are a raging homo that needs to get out and suck a cock, then guess what? This show is not for you, because you’ll get to see all sorts of guys in the buff, all the time and that will make the repressed homosexual in you angry enough to beat your children at night for no good reason. Now if nude men don’t bother you as long as there are a boatload of gorgeous naked women around **Full Frontal** then once again, this show IS for you. Oh and how could I forget… Lucy “Motherfucking Xena” Lawless is in this showing her goods every single episode and I’ll tell you what. She looks good.

I watched the show on Netflix, but would not mind getting this on DVD. And that means that I am willing to watch the entire season of Spartacus: Blood and Sand all over again. This prompts me to give the show 4.5 meaty steaks taking away half a steak because of the cheesy CGI and music whenever battles occur. The music constantly gave me the feeling that Lorenza Lamas was about to appear out of left field.

Like

Unlike